Painkiller Education

When I can fully articulate what the Lord has been doing in my life in the past 2 weeks, I will write, I promise. It's a little intense and I feel like there's more to the story - so get excited!

In the meantime, I thought I would write a little treatise on how to use painkillers. Much of my unplanned time off work in the past few weeks has been due to painkiller-related issues, so I figured it might be helpful to spell out how to actually use them. And no, my doctor or nurse did not explain this to me. I learned this all by myself!

1. No matter what they say, take the painkiller with food. And not just some crackers, FOOD. If it's the middle of the night, you're going to have to eat, simple as that.

2. Ask for an anti-emetic (like Zofran) to help with the nausea. Take the Zofran WITH the painkiller and you may even be able to get away with smaller amounts of food.

3. Have a plan. Most painkillers only last 3-4 hours. I take one set when I go to bed, but I know I will wake up, in pain, at some point. It helps to relieve stress if you already have a plan. Ok, I will probably wake up at 4 VERY uncomfortable, so I will simply take these pills and then eat these dried cherries and lay back down to rest. No time wasted agonizing over which painkiller to take and how much, etc.

4. Get a variety of painkillers. I have a mild one and one that is more potent. I use the milder one during the day (it doesn't make me sleepy) and the potent one at night since it makes me sleepy and my pain is worse at night. I have to plan the night medication, though, so I'm not drowsy for the first 2-3 hours of my day.

5. Don't be a hero. The best way to love yourself when you're in pain is to use what God has provided as relief. Take the pills!

Dear ones, I hope you are never in physical pain that requires prescriptions, but if you are, I hope this advice helps. It certainly would have helped me! :)

Home!

A few highlights from my trip home this weekend for a friend's wedding.

1. Meet Herbie, my new humidifier.

2. I received this house-warming gift (1 year late) from my Camp Daisy friends:

3. I FINALLY procured a used treadmill for my father. WIN!

4. I went to my friend Alicia's wedding and had a blast

5. I wore my mask on the plane and saw beautiful sunsets.

Some days...

Some days are good, when I forget I even have an autoimmune disease. Some days are bad, and some weeks are bad, when the doctors I see all say “I can’t do anything for you.” Sometimes the treatment fails, and you have to try something new. Your hope is always changing; hope in the new treatment, hope that the specialist you’ve come to can somehow fix your eye - and my hope in God is always the there, but there are some days when it’s stronger than others. I know He knows the end of this, and I rest in the fact that there WILL be an end, but some days are just hard.

And then sometimes I just feel completely alone. I wish I had someone to go to my doctor’s appointments with, to say, “It’s okay, I’m going to support you 100%.” I want someone to sit with me during infusion treatments, to say, “Even if this doesn’t work, I still believe in you.” I want someone to physically be there for me, when I can’t and when I have weak moments in my belief.

This isn’t the same as the last time I relapsed, it’s harder. I’m away from my family. The treatment isn’t working. My eye is still swollen and I’m now having double vision. My hair is falling out - it almost scares me when I look at the shower drain and the back of my jacket.

And then there are days where, even though I planned this trip 2 months ago for a different reason, I get to fly home and spend time with my family at the time I need it the most. So that’s good. And as always...

God is good, even when my day isn’t.

I Think I'm Actually an Adult Now!

Happy New Year!

This is not a post about my new year's resolutions, and mostly because I only have like 2 and they aren't crazy enough to share. I believe in goal setting, but most of my desires for this year can't be put in proper goal form, so I will just let you know that I intend on being awesome this year. That's it. :)

I woke up this morning and didn't feel any different. But after I sat down with my Bible and begun my 2-year quest to read my entire Bible, I was blown away by where I am in life and where God has brought me to.

All our lives, we are aware that there is a next step. After Kindergarten, we go to 1st grade. After elementary school, we enter junior high. Then high school. Then college. Then grad school (or job). Once we have a job, we get married and have kids. I know this is a generalization, but essentially we always know there is something that is "next" that is the normal progression of our life. For me, the ultimate goal was to get a job, which was why I enrolled in grad school - to get more training. After grad school, I got a job thank the Lord!

But once I had a job, there was a new city to explore, the new dynamics of living far away from my family, and the newness of it all - people, church, community, grocery stores, etc. Once I got a job, the next step was to feel at home.

So this morning, as I was contemplating how it's true that I ACTUALLY LIVE in Austin, TX and I have a church family and home, good friends, and am relatively acquainted with the city, I'm not sure what's left to do! In the natural progression above, I should be getting married, but seeing as that's not on the horizon or appears to be, we'll assume that's either happening in the future or not happening at all. :)

I kept asking myself, what's there to do next? And then I realized I'm a full-fledged adult now. I can pick whatever I want! I can decide to pursue my relationship with God more (number 1 priority right now), move to another city, invest in a non-profit, go to South America for 5 months to learn how to speak Spanish in a school (as my friend Wendy is doing), go sky diving, minister to the homeless, and the list goes on and on! I feel like I'm on the edge of a cliff, and I have the whole world waiting for me. What's even more exciting is that God has an amazing plan that will rock my socks off! How fun!

Here's to 2011 and all that God is going to do!