Meet my new niece!

Claire Abigail May

Born June 30, 2010

5:16 pm (EST)

8 lbs, 19 inches long

(what a face!! she's all enh, I'm cold!)

Pretty Awesome Weekend

This past week was slightly stressful for many reasons. My cousin was just diagnosed with cancer and work was crazy due to some staffing changes. I was really looking forward to the weekend but didn't really care what I did - just wanted to relax. Well, I definitely did that!

Friday evening I was invited to a dinner at a friend's house. The chef was a friend who had just returned from culinary school in Italy and wanted to share his gift. I was thinking -oh, just some pasta and wine and good conversation. OH MY GOODNESS. It was so good. It ended up being a 5-course dinner that took all night and I loved every minute of it. The group that was invited was kind of an eclectic bunch, and we switched seats often so I pretty much got to talk to everyone. Love it!

Saturday I spent the day on Lake Travis with my friend Stacie and other friends from Camp Eagle. It was really fun to be outside all day in the sun. It probably was hot temperature wise, but we were in the water and shade so much, I didn't even notice. It all ended with a BBQ at Stacie's parent's house and conversation that lasted until midnight. Awesome!

And today I got up early and worked in the yard, mowing and weeding. After a shower and good lunch, I'm ready to relax again for a bit before church. I love my life!

Would you choose to suffer?

I had a very important meeting today with my financial counselor. Amongst the items we discussed was the possibility of me getting an extra part-time job. Ever since I graduated from school in December, I knew at some point I would need some extra income for a few months to help speed up the payoff of some debts. Well, that time has come. I always hoped I wouldn't have to, but now I'm faced with the fact that I might have to.

We had a good discussion about possibilities and she suggested looking at my current place of employment. What an idea! I really had not thought of that. I haven't taken any steps in that direction yet, and for now I'm just trying to wrap my mind around the fact that I might be working 50 or 60 hours a week.

I'll be busy. Let's say I want to do 12 hours extra a week. That's 3 days of 4 extra hours (say, 3:15-7:15 pm). I wouldn't get home until 7:45 and in order to be ready for work the next day, I'd need to be in bed by 9:30. Granted it's only 3 days/week, but that means I only get a few evenings a week free. Could I do that?

One thing my counselor reminded me of was to think of times in my life where I had to do something for a year or so that was hard. Or went through a hard time knowing it would be over soon. Immediately I remembered when I've been sick and had to be on the amazing-but-chipmunk-cheek-inducing steroids. I knew it would be over soon. And it was. Looking back it wasn't that hard.

So that's how I'm going to approach this next year. It will be over soon. And in several years, I can look back and say I worked hard to get through it and Lord provided. I firmly believe that if I put forth the effort and trust the Lord, He will bless me and take care of me. Heck, he does that even if I don't trust Him. That's how awesome He is!

Trip Home

My extended weekend home was wonderful! It felt so comfortable and familiar, and while it was easier to say goodbye this time than last time, it was still hard. I feel kind of a limbo-like place where Austin is becoming my home and Lawrence still feels like home. I definitely enjoyed it, though, and have some pictures on facebook for your pleasure. (Side note: when you fellow blogspot bloggers add pics to your post, is there an easier way so they don't all get posted at the beginning of the text? tips?)

This is the first time in my life where I have not had a change in lifestyle or season. I am still working through and through, and while I did take a 5 day vacation, I'm used to having a few weeks off in between activities. It's odd, but I think I like it. Just in transition, learning how to be an adult!

I flew Southwest roundtrip, which is my preferred airline. They're a bit more friendly, sometimes sing for you, and don't charge extra for your bags. I know it's only $10-15 and probably is calculated into their fare, but it's the mere convenience of not having to pay that makes it appealing. AND! If you're quick enough, you can sit in the front row and be the first off the plane! After flying SW over the years I've developed a seat priority plan:

1. First, if ANY of the seats in the front row is open, sit there! More leg room! (Yes, you aren't allowed to have your bag in front of you, but if it's a short flight, just hold your book.)

2. If #1 isn't possible, or it's a long flight, shoot for the exit row. Again, more leg room! They'll ask if you feel ok sitting there and can perform the functions blah blah, but who ever needs to?

3. If none of the above are available, I go for an aisle seat.

Typically, because I stalk the website the minutes before I can check in, I'm in the A group and #1 and #2 are very likely. I'm not a huge fan of flying, so I try to get off the plane as soon as possible and/or stretch my legs out as much as I can.

I just booked my flight to Marco Island in August today and can't wait to go! Maybe I'm obsessed with travel? Who knows!

Romancing the Past

Life is interesting. I've been a little distracted this month with being sick, going to camp almost every weekend, and getting ready for my intern. Now that I'm kind of back in focus, my schedule shifts even more as I'm going home next week. Sigh.

One thing I do want to share is something I learned last night in my Beth Moore Bible study. We were discussing the Israelites and their reaction to wandering in the desert. At one point, they start talking about how they wish they were back in Egypt where they got to eat meat! Oh, how glorious it was! So much better than manna!

Beth Moore's point was that we often romanticize the past when our current situation is rough. We often pull out the old pictures, read our old journals, and take a trip down memory lane in effort to think how great of a time it was.

Visiting camp has been a great distraction this month. Last weekend, I brought my scrapbook so that Jason could look at it. I loved going through it and remembering how amazing those summers were - the Lord working through me, the crazy adventures and nights of thunderstorms. I visited with the summer staff, secretly wishing I could have summers off so I could just even be at camp. But I never though about the mornings I woke up and didn't want to be there, or the storms that gave me hypothermia and made me really scared, or the times I really didn't like Jason for the task that he gave me. At least I never though about it until last night when Beth Moore was talking about romancing the past. Then it clicked. I was using camp to live in the past because I didn't really like my present.

I was bitter.

I keep wanting my trials to be over, to get some respite, to breathe. But I can't do that. I need to focus on today and only today. Yes, it may suck, but it's what I've been given. And what the Lord has given me is for my good, will result in His glory, and it exactly what I need.

I just need to believe it.

A Most Ridiculous Week

So I guess the trial isn't over yet.

On Sunday, after returning from camp, my Check Engine light went on. In the 5+ years I have owned the car, none of the lights had gone on, even when major repair was needed. So I figured it was a good idea to take it into the shop and hopefully this would help them discover what was wrong with the not-starting for me and starting for them issue.

Monday afternoon I dropped Derek off at the shop and picked up a rental car. Tuesday the shop called just to say they didn't know what was going on yet, but they'd keep looking. So far so good. Tuesday evening as I was getting into bed I was COLD, like shivering, teeth-chattering cold, and my temperature shot up to 102 in addition to several trips to the bathroom. Needless to say, I did not go to work yesterday.

The shop called yesterday while I was recovering on the couch and informed me that it would be $1000 to fix the car. CHOKE. I told them I needed more time to think about it, I'd call in the morning. In the mean time, I'm trying to figure out if it's worth spending that much to fix it or would it be a better investment to just buy a new, more reliable car? After talking with my friends, I conceded that I just needed a car that would run. I originally said I needed Derek to last a year while I'm paying off some medical debt, but I hesitantly figured I could squeeze a small car payment in somewhere.

Because I have to be fever-free for 24 hours before returning to work, I wasn't allowed to come in today. So this morning I called the shop, told them I wanted to just trash it and get a new one, and the guy encouraged me to come in and take a look at it. He spent a good deal of time with me, and I was paying attention, but I also could feel myself starting to tear up. You know those times where you're trying NOT to cry and it's just not working? Yeah, that was this time. Here he was trying to convince me that he could SAVE it and it wasn't as bad as it COULD be, and I was just confused because what I am to do now? I was more embarrassed than anything. But he was really nice and understood what I was going through and told me to wait a few seconds while he talked to his boss. The result? A new quote of $600! After some calculations, I said yes.

So this week I have gone from not having a car, to possibly getting a new one, to fixing the one I have, all with a GI illness mixed in. I'm pretty exhausted. But this weekend I'm headed to camp again, and I can't wait. I always find rest there, and I hope that this weekend isn't any different!

Impatient with Inefficiency

Last fall, with impending job interviews in sight, I decided I should practice answers to common questions, like what are you strengths and weaknesses? Anyone can name their strengths, but I was always at a loss for weaknesses. I'm not perfect, I know I have them, but I just didn't know what they were. So I asked my mother, because she knows (me) best.

She said I can be impatient with inefficiency.

Whaaat? I thought about it. And after much observation, it's very true. I'm always looking for ways to make processes easier and better (more efficient), and I do get frustrated when tasks take forever or I get interrupted. Hence, my frustrating day.

I'm still trying to learn time management at work, which is frustrating to me - there should be a better way to figure out what is priority! I have an intern coming in one week, and her binder has yet to be put together. I also have the weekly task of doing follow-up calls, and the more I procrastinate week to week, the more calls I have to make. In addition, I also do a lot of tasks that need to be done but are not done consistently; I'm the only one that is there everyday, so typically that falls to me. And then when it's 3:45 and time to leave, I'm surprised that I have made so little progress on anything.

And then there's my blood thinner. I ran out last week and called the pharmacy to refill. They needed to contact the doctor. Okay, no problem, usually takes a day or so. I phoned the doctor as well to give them a head's up. A few days later, still not filled. Phone the doctor yet again, but it's the weekend, so I don't get a response until yesterday. Yes, he'll fill it, but he wants me to get a blood test (that monitors my blood viscosity) to check and make sure the dosage is right. I agree. The order is faxed to the hospital where I work, and I plan to get it done after I clock out at 3:45. I didn't leave until 5:00. Why did it take that long to do a 1-minute blood draw? Inefficiency! In the form of mix-up with the orders, calling my doctor's cell phone because the main line said it was "after hours" at 4:00, and then finding out it was someone else's fault. Sheesh. It's just a stinkin blood test, how inefficient at that can you be?

It may not normally have bothered me, but it was the end of the day, I was hoping to get in and out and then go work out, which never happened. And when I don't work out, I'm usually a bit more stressed and a little less happy.

So what's the cure? I'm typically a patient person, EXCEPT when I know how the process could've been done better. Sigh.